daughter of eve

i spent the day with someone i took for granted for so long. in my selfishness, i failed to be the friend that he needed. i reasoned time and again that i was going through something so i couldn't spare time soothing someone else. nevermind that i was battling my tendencies to lose hope. maybe if i listened to another person's troubles, i wouldn't have been too preoccupied with my own. i had been a terrible friend. and worse, i had been an unfaithful child of God. i had forgotten that this life i live had long ago been offered up to Him. or that He has equipped me with everything i need to face my battles. i failed to trust His promise that He would never leave me nor forsake me. i had been so ungrateful for the sacrifice He made that i pondered taking my life. then i remembered that it is no longer i who live...

i started crying at the beginning of the movie, "the lion, the witch, and the wardrobe". i was thinking about susan and the consequences of not continuing in our faith. i'm going too far ahead in the chronicles of narnia for those who had not read the books... and i observed that the enemy's lies seem sweet, but the mask falls off when we are at their mercy, not that they show any. our betrayal inflicts great pain. and yet He welcomes us with open arms and remembers our sin no more. unworthy as we are, He died that we may live.

but i can't help but ask... why did Father Christmas not give them a ride? i guess we're back to the part where they were equipped with weapons and told, "these are tools, not toys. handle them well and wisely." or something like that. the thing is to be grateful instead of demanding more.